He is my Light and my Salvation
whom have i to fear
in His secret place i’ll hide and pray
that i might hear a simple word

o, how i would have despaired
if You had not come found me there
i can lean against Your throne and find my peace
find my peace

and when my enemies draw near
i pray that they will find
that i’m protected and secure
all tempests He will bind with a mighty word

o, how i would have despaired
if You had not come found me there
i can lean against Your throne and find my peace
find my peace

o, how i would have despaired
if You had not come found me there
i can lean against Your throne and find my peace
i can lean against Your throne and find
lean against Your throne and find
lean against Your throne and find
my peace

He is my Light and my Salvation whom have i to fear?
click to listen

Great weekend

I haven’t had a weekend this good in a long time. Got the 26pin camera cable ordered ($1500 for a wire) Got the wall finished. Romeo and Nancy, thanks again for all your help. Got the talley system finished on the video switcher.
It’s just been a good weekend. It’s really been restfull. Just what i needed. Yesterday i got to sleep in late. Patti and i went to dinner at tony romas, and went to see just like heaven. It was really cute. I really enjoyed it. I’m really looking forward to this week.. i think it’s goign to end up pretty good.

Lost in Vana’diel

Last night, I felt uneasy about the set list for tonight’s service. I had it all planned out, like last week’s. In fact, tonight’s set list was planned since last week’s practice. Why did I feel uneasy? Is it because God doesn’t give a flip about my bloated plans? Possibly. I remember when the opportunity to be “a week ahead” came. It was the night we lost power in the youth building. I thought, maybe we can be “ahead of the game”. But looking back now, what does that even mean? Who are we trying to pull ahead of? I don’t know. The camp high is finally starting to fade, the real world is grinding down on people. You know, I have told myself time and again to just go nuts during worship and have fun. To let go and let God, if you’ll pardon the cliche. Does every worship leader go through this? Or do they have a clear idea of what is supposed to happen? Joe would have me believe I can know, with black and white certainty, the will of God. If that is true, then I guess I’m behind the pack, because I have no idea what I’m doing!

Anyway…I need to get to Algebra. May His will be done.


in reference to i have been thinking about this alot. I mean.. this past vacation i got an offer from Entravision.. and The Monitor had an opening.. i had the chance to really start to consider being somewhere else. But then i started to wonder why.. i mean.. I’d love to be at a point financially where i don’t have to depend on the check from church.. to where i can tell them to just keep there money and not need it to survive. Not be forced to give in to this whole chior idea because it’s my job. I’d love to be at a point financially where i can be an actual provider for Patti and the kids. I don’t want to be held back just by the fact that i can’t afford it. But is leaving cc the answer? I think i have something alot more important than just $ here. I have a great staff that i get to work with.. i have awesome friends.. people who i can entrust and don’t have to go back and double check things i’ve asked them to do. I have a great working enviroment. I mean it’s got it’s down points but nothing that i would consider substantial enough to leave. Being at that radiothon yesterday and the day before that.. i got to realize.. that it’s not the job that i’m doing it for. .it’s not the money.. i didn’t put in all those hours just for because it’s my job but because i love doing stuff like that. I love the challange and the chance to put the skills i have to a great use.

The World moves on…

I hope Joe doesn’t know about this site. If he does, well, screw it. For those who don’t know (and may possibly care the tiniest bit), I have quit the adult worship team. I have several reasons for doing so, but don’t worry. This isn’t going to turn into an overblown list like the villains. For overblown (and boy, do I mean overblown) lists, visit my xanga site @ .

Anyway, I’m mostly glad, partly sad about leaving. Mostly glad because it seems like we lonely musicians are being swept into the gutter to give the choir more air time. Is this a bad thing? Is it good? I’m not the one to judge that, really. All I know is that I personally don’t like it, and would rather not deal with it. I am saddened that I will no longer get to thump on my bass and set the groove with Johnny or back up David’s phenomenal keyboard skills. I miss the days when all the singers and musicians would sit and chat and pray. I felt more connected then, even though I am not one to connect with much of anyone. I miss the days when I could clearly define who the leader of the worship team was. I miss the days when I didn’t know the rumors, even though they were still there. But the world has moved on since then. Is it a bad thing? Is it a good thing? A wise woman once said:

“You can not stop change anymore than you can stop the suns from setting” – Shmi Skywalker.

Whatever. Joe didn’t seem too heartbroken over my decision, not that I was expecting him to be. Besides, I’ve been kind of a nuisance lately when it comes to respecting authority (not necessarily Joe). I think the one BIG tip off that things were never going to be the same was when one of the choir members was praying to dismiss a practice and he said the following words (not exact quote, but pretty darn near):

“Lord, I pray that you bless this choir minsitry…”

Suddenly, I was filled with understanding. We were no longer a worship team, we were a band backing a choir. At least, that’s my interpretation. I don’t really know if that’s what he meant, or if it was just a small part of the kind of rambling, talkative, prayer our church specializes in (the kind that just keeps going, and going, and going, and going, and ends about 10-23 minutes later…but that’s a different rant). Anyway, I don’t hate the choir on a personal level. Any and all complaints stem from a professional degree of criticism…or something. But whatever. If anyone feels like commenting on this, by all means, let me know what you think, Patty, John, Johnny (if you’re out there, I’m thinking of you…). Whatever, I need to start practice.

Friday already?

Wow.. where did this week go. I mean i got alot done. And i got to rest alot. I think all this time i spent at home thew ozzie for a loop. Romeo helped me get this project at church finished. I couldn’t have done it without all of his help. I don’t think i’ve ever giving him a project that he hasn’t been able to do. Thanks for everything Romeo. It’s going to be strang getting back into the swing of things. Patti woke up sick this morning.. check on her this am.. i’ll swing by again later today after getting some stuff done here.

Fatal error number 27

I’m working along on my computer, minding my own business (literally), and all my stuff disappears from the screen except for that dreaded message “Fatal error number 27 together with a highlighted box that says “OK?” “NOT OK!” I scream at my computer. With increasing exasperation and futility, I click elsewhere on my screen. But I’ve been there before done that, and I know with dire certainty that my computer won’t let me do anything else except click on “OK.” I want a “Not OK” box to click. Other messages that we all get from our computers every day are just like this. There’s a famous one that gives you the alternatives ABORT, CANCEL, RETRY. I always choose “retry.” Sounds like a good idea, doesn’t it? After all, everyday life is like this. We’ve all learned the old wisdom, “If at first you don`t succeed, try, try, try again.” So I click RETRY. It never works. The awful thing about computers is that if it doesn’t work the first time, it isn’t going to work the second time either. Nevertheless, hope springs eternal; maybe next time RETRY will work. I never learn. What I really want is an UNDO button. When this is an option, computers are in fact better than real life. How many times in life have i wished that I could push UNDO? Now that computer lore has become the culture, I think of it often. If only I could go back and not have done was I did. Alas all too often, my whatever, behavior in life, as in computers, is imperfect. Whenever I deal with computers, there is one sure bit of knowledge in the back of my mind I can always reboot. The reset button beckons to me. Even pulling the power plug from the wall has a certain emotional appeal. Forget everything I’ve done lately; lets just start all over. Again, sigh, if real life were only like that. Just every now and then-because this is a drastic solution-the notion of a personal reboot to the last preserved state appeals to me. What with all the progress in cloning technology, who knows what might be possible? Incredible, but true, that just as I finished that last sentence, my screen half disappeared, and I got a message box saying, “This program has performed an illegal operation and will be shut down.” I’m using a brand new version of the word processor. What was the illegal operation, I wonder. Am I forbidden to talk about these error messages? Is there a filter in the new version that detects my negative slant on the error messages? This time the box gives me two options: CLOSE and DETAILS. Obviously, I don’t want to close, although fortunately I have just saved the work (as if this were worth saving!). So, as always, I push DETAILS. I know what t am going to get, but I push it anyway. You would think that when you ask for details, you would get something like: “Well, unfortunately, you tried to invoke the flogistor when you were in the obviator mode. Please don’t do that again.

Did you ever have one of those days?

well, it’s monday and did you ever have one of those days that you feel like you’re gonna be yelled at today, like someone is really upset or mad or unconfortable with you? That’s how I feel today, I don’t know..its something in my gut today that says it’s gonna be a bad day today..I spent most of the weekend in bed, I don’t know why I just feel more confort while I’m in bed…maybe I was just being lazy or being a vegtable…Hopefully your day will go by better and mine will go quick…Do you ever have one of these days? I hope I’m not the only one….

The ratings came out….

Well, we came in Third overall, but I went down in Afternoons, Big Al went WAY up, Keith did better, even Ric did good, This was a strange book…its the polar opposite of the last book….everybody says that maybe because I was so focused on getting everybody else up, I sacrificed my show, or maybe it was my breakdown, I wasn’t focused because of the breakdown, but I am not gonna use that as a excuse..I will do better newxt time, I’m just gonna become a little more conservative..a little more classic rock during my show..get rid of the six oclock rock block, and change the fourplay at four to the All Request hour (since the beat also has a fourpaly at four and maybe people got confused..) you know me, YEA! WE MADE THIRD..okay back to work…lol…I seriously thought Hot Kiss was gonna dominate..I never expected Reggaton (which I despise!) and WILD (which I HATE!!!!) to do good..I dont care what the numbers say..Hot Kiss sounds way better than Mix…they sound old and boring while hot kiss sounds Fresh….the morning show rocks (they sound like they are having a good time, and the music is right on…) I give big props to Jay Cantu, Jay Z. and punkass…your day will come I guarantee..