The Birk Economic Recovery Plan

Hi Pals,

I’m against the $85,000,000, 000.00 bailout of AIG. Instead, I’m in favor of giving $85,000,000, 000 to America in a We Deserve It Dividend. To make the math simple, let’s assume there are 200,000,000 bonafide U.S. Citizens 18+. Our population is about 301,000,000 +/- counting every man, woman and child. So 200,000,000 might be a fair stab at adults 18 and up..

So divide 200 million adults 18+ into $85 billion that equals $425,000.00.

My plan is to give $425,000 to every person 18+ as a We Deserve It Dividend. Of course, it would NOT be tax free. So let’s assume a tax rate of 30%. Every individual 18+ has to pay $127,500.00 in taxes. That sends $25,500,000, 000 right back to Uncle Sam . But it means that every adult 18+ has $297,500.00 in their pocket.

A husband and wife has $595,000.00. What would you do with $297,500.00 to $595,000.
00 in your family?

Pay off your mortgage – housing crisis solved.

Repay college loans – what a great boost to new grads
Put away money for college – it’ll be there
Save in a bank – create money to loan to entrepreneurs.

Buy a new car – create jobs
Invest in the market – capital drives growth
Pay for your parent’s medical insurance – health care improves
Enable Deadbeat Dads to come clean – or else

Remember this is for every adult U S Citizen 18+ including the folks who lost their jobs at Lehman Brothers and every other company that is cutting back. And of course, for those serving in our Armed Forces.

If we’re going to re-distribute wealth let’s really do it…instead of trickling out a puny $1000.00 ( “vote buy” ) economic incentive that is being proposed by one of our candidates for President.

If we’re going to do an $85 billion bailout, let’s bail out every adult U S Citizen 18+!

As for AIG – liquidate it. Sell off its parts. Let American General go back to being American General.

Sell off the real estate. Let the private sector bargain hunters cut it up and clean it up. Here’s my rationale. We deserve it and AIG doesn’t. Sure it’s a crazy idea that can “never work.

But can you imagine the Coast-To-Coast Block Party! How do you spell Economic Boom? I trust my fellow adult Americans to know how to use the $85 Billion We Deserve It Dividend more than I do the geniuses at AIG or in Washington DC .

And remember, The Birk plan only really costs $59.5 Billion because $25.5 Billion is returned instantly in taxes to Uncle Sam . Ahhh…I feel so much better getting that off my chest.

Kindest personal regards,

T. J.
Birkenmeier, A Creative Guy & Citizen of the Republic

2 thoughts on “The Birk Economic Recovery Plan”

  1. I like it! Of course, this would hinge on Americans actually using it to pay off their hastily signed bad debt in an unprecedented amount of foresight…which they lacked when they got the loans in the first place. But it sounds great for us semi-responsible ones who haven’t taken on a truckload and a half of debt!

  2. You very appropriately filed this under “humor”. The concept is interesting. The math, however, is where the humor lies. This concept was forwarded to me numerous times via email. I read through it a few times, and for some reason, it just didn’t make sense to me. After a while, it hit me…

    $85,000,000,000 / 200,000,000 = $425.00

    I suppose that sum would cover one month’s car payment and electricity bill. Uncle Sam *did* stiff me out of a stimulus payment this year, so perhaps that $425 payment would be in order. 🙂

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